Dear Girl Doing Her Make Up On The Bus,
I understand that you may be running late. I really, really do. Hell, I’m late for work almost every day. Probably because I DO MY MAKE UP AT HOME.
I was ok with it when you pulled out your make up bag and mirror. Everyone needs a little touch up now and then. I was shocked, however, when you started plucking your eyebrows. No one needs to see that on their morning commute. And, let’s face it: it’s just not sanitary. Since you seem to be going to town over there, I can only assume that you’re plucking tons of tiny little stray hairs out of your face, which are then falling all over the bus seat and floor. Gross. I know buses are kinda dirty to begin with, but do you really need to add to it?
You’ve moved on to foundation now. Really? You’re using liquid foundation on the bus? That’s just a disaster waiting to happen. I’m also amused that you seem not to notice that half of the bus is staring at you. You’re somewhat of a spectacle. You should start charging people.
You’re really going to put your whole face on during this trip, aren’t you? Here’s a tip: set your alarm for 15 minutes earlier and get this done before you leave the house.
You just pulled out your eyeliner. I’m worried you’ll poke your eye out. You clearly don’t feel the same.
Just don’t start cutting your fingernails.
The Girl Who Hopes The Bus Hits A Pothole
Song of the day: The Swiss Army Romance by Dashboard Confessional